


Full disclosure

by MalcolmReynoldsWidow (malcolm_reynolds_widow)



Category: Castle
Genre: Castle Fanfic Prompts, Dialogue-Only, Gen, Humor, Pre-Relationship, Public Nudity, Undercover as a Couple, Worksafe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-18
Updated: 2014-11-18
Packaged: 2018-02-26 04:44:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2638550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/malcolm_reynolds_widow/pseuds/MalcolmReynoldsWidow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Tell me again how you got me into this mess. How I could have missed the memo about the type of resort this is."</p><p>"Me! I'm just the plucky sidekick, remember?"</p><p>"The plucky <i>naked</i> sidekick. A nudist retreat, really? This is the stupidest excuse for undercover work I've ever heard."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Full disclosure

**Author's Note:**

> For a prompt on castlefanficprompts.tumblr.com: "At any time during the series: Beckett and Castle pose as a couple for an undercover operation - so to speak - at a nudist retreat." (Or 'naturist retreat' for those across the pond.)
> 
> I imagine this taking place at any time before the end of season four.

"Tell me again how you got me into this mess. How I could have missed the memo about the type of resort this is."

"Me! I'm just the plucky sidekick, remember?"

"The plucky naked sidekick. A nudist colony, really? This is the stupidest excuse for undercover work I've ever heard."

"So to speak. Besides, you have nothing to be ashamed of, Beckett. And I mean that in the most respectful way possible."

"You've been _respectfully_ checking me out, Castle?"

"Notice how well I've been keeping my eyes up."

"For the last five minutes, maybe. Okay then, turnabout is fair play."

"Whaaa - ?"

"You heard me. Stand up, turn around. Slowly, slowly. Hmm..."

"I don't like the sound of that _hmmm_..."

"Too bad, partner. Ah, ah, ah - no fig leaf hands, please. Full disclosure."

". . ."

"Beckett? Should I be worried about your sudden silence? Is there a - um - something amiss?"

"What? Sorry, Castle, I was a little - preoccupied."

"With what? Is there - blubber? Or a tumor, or something?"

"Quit panicking - everything looks - um - fine. Turn one more time, please."

"Why am I doing this again?"

"Well, if we're supposed to be lovers, I should know your body intimately, shouldn't I?"

"I think me being nude 24/7 is enough for you to make observations in regard to any intimacy required for this mission."

"Don't pout."

"Don't snicker. I'm going to bed now. This is the side I sleep on. I trust that meets with your approval."

"Sure, Castle. You sleep wherever you want. I'll just curl up over here..."

"Back to back. Holy crap, your feet are cold. Stay on your side, Beckett."

"Oh, grow a pair, Castle."

"I already have a pair, as you'd know if you'd really looked."

"Is that an invitation?"

"Go to sleep, Beckett."

_Next morning:_

"Good morning, sunshine."

"Hrmpf? Beckett? What time is - ? Whoa, what are you doing?"

"Being the big spoon, you big doofus. I figured it was safer than the other way around. Which you tried last night, by the way."

"Oh, God."

"You're nice and toasty, Castle. Especially when you blush."

"The fact that my genitals are still intact reassures me that even in my sleep I didn't try anything untoward."

"Hey! Where are you going with the sheet?"

"To the bathroom... to tend to something in regard to the forementioned genitalia."

"Which I've seen already."

"Not like this, you haven't."


End file.
